6 months

I think maybe it is about time to write about what happened to me six months ago. It all actually started years ago. I had been having these odd feelings in my throat which came now and then, like xomething was stuck in my throat. Something that wasn’t suppose to be there. But I let be. I thought it was signs of a flu or something. But after awhile it started to bother me more and  more. I thought it was an infection which would go away in time. But then on one cold, winter day, about 10months ago, my mom made a small threat to call the doctor if I didn’t do it myself. So I called and went to see the doctor, she emmediatly directed me to another doctor to get my neck looked at with ultrasound. I got the results right after christmas when the doctor told me it was something that another doctor must look.

So then it was more waiting and three months later I got a letter from the hospital which said “The removal of the thyroid gland”. I went in to shock. I never thought that it was that serious. Days went by and on a cloudy friday morning I went to see the doctor. The doctor was nice, but the way she told me what was going on I can still hear in my head “cancer”, “operation”, “97%” and my exs words “Holy shit!” when I told her what the doctor said. 
A few weeks later I had the operation and it went well. It was odd to be a patient when I’m almost a fully qualified nurse myself. The recover went well, dispite the problems I had with my calsium levels, but now they are in control with food.

In the beginning of summer I had radioiodine treatment which made me stay in isolation for 4,5 days. The experince was rough mentally, to be stuck in a small room and the only fresh air at first I got was on the third day when I got to go out for a half an hour. You really start to respect simple things when they arw taken away from you totally for a while. Summer came and I got my thyroxin medication and it started to help, but at the same I started to lose my red, curly hair. Which came as a shock cause no-one never told me it could happen. I didn’t lose all my hair, luckily.
In August I had my very first labs with the medication and the levels were abit too high so the doctor cut the medication down abit.
Lately people around me plus me have noticed that I have black-out in my memory and I think it might be cause of the medication, that I’m not getting enough of it right now.

Today I reached my 6months free from cancer and for me it was a big deal. yes all sorts of emotions and thought have ran through me today. I got flowers from one of my dearest friends who lives on the other side of the world. But the one person i had hoped and wished that would congratulate me on reaching this mile-stone didn’t even remember. I waited and waited for her to do something, but nothing happened. It put me down.

To sum the 6 months up, I have grown as a human being alot, gotten to know myself better, I feel more focused on things, I don’t take things for granted anymore, I try to enjoy the small things in life more and I hope oneday I will find happiness and love again.


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